Our Hope Endures

Family Pictures 2009

2009-12-11T13:30:00.000-05:00

I have totally lost my drive to blog these days...hopefully it will return soon.

But, in the meantime, here are our newest pictures.

Trey - almost 5 years old

Miss Gillian - 4 months old

I love these babes.

Babes that I never thought I'd have.

I am blessed.

Merry Christmas!!

The Cunninghams

Baby Announcement!

2009-10-05T12:00:00.001-04:00

Back in May I won a blog contest from

Sarah at Short Stop.

The prize was 20 free custom designed cards from Karen at

Too Cute Designs.

It has been such a great experience to work with Karen who personally

designed this great baby announcement for me!

Thanks so much Karen, you did an awesome job!

Gillian Renee is here!

2009-08-25T10:00:00.004-04:00

Gillian Renee
August 5, 2009
6lbs 5oz, 19in

Trey & his baby sister

Big Brother...almost.

2009-08-04T19:05:00.000-04:00

Will You Please Try?

2009-06-13T14:30:00.000-04:00

This is a plea that I share on behalf of my friend Melissa. I have posted about her before on here and there are some new developments. You can see Melissa's blog here and her sister Jenn's blog here.

This letter is written by Jenn. I couldn't put it better any other way. So please read and consider... And by all means, please continue to pray for her and her family.

Where do I even begin? My sister Melissa is in increasing pain from the growing tumor and lymphoma. She sounds weak when I speak to her on the phone...possibly from the pain, or the pain meds, or the lymphoma itself, or a combination of the three. She said she literally feels like she is waiting for a new heart or a new lung....that's what it is like to be dependent on the generosity of donors.

I'm not just trying to encourage you to join the National Bone Marrow Registry because it's a wonderful, humanitarian thing to do. I'm asking you this because I don't want to lose my sister.

Out of the 7 million people in our country on the registry, only ONE appears right now to be a possible match for her. And that's not even definite yet. Her nurse just told me that yesterday.THAT is why it's so imporant that I get tons more people to join for her sake right now.

Most people hesitate to become a donor because they think either--
a) it's painful (No pain involved--it's a simple cheek swab.)
b) it's complicated (It's 30 seconds on the internet. We easily spend 30 minutes on Facebook.)

Here is the SIMPLE process:

1) Go to www.marrow.org
2) Click on "Join Registry"
3) It will ask you to agree to terms, give your name, email address, create a password, and give your mailing address.
4) They will mail you a cheek swab kit. You collect the cells and mail it back in.Once they receive and test your sample, it AUTOMATICALLY goes into the system. Then it is immediately checked to see if it is a match.

If you have any questions at all, call 1-800- Marrow2. They are very kind and helpful there. The registration process usually costs $50 for that initial testing, but is FREE now until June 22nd.

There will never be any other cost for you. If you are a match for my sister, her insurance will cover it.Please take a moment to do this for my sister...for her husband who is so in love with her...for her 3 smaill kids who need their mommy...for the rest of us, as her family and friends, who want nothing more but to have more years with her.

Thank you BEYOND words...Jenn

Monster Trucks!

2009-05-17T21:00:00.003-04:00

This weekend was the Monster Truck Show...a place this city girl never thought she'd find herself, and then she had a son! :) It was a good time and the looks on Trey's face were worth it!

Here are a few pictures from the day!!

Ramunition

Trey, Daddy & BigFoot!

SnakeBite

SnakeBite's Fangs

The Avenger

He wore his rain boots and rain coat and enjoyed jumping in the very muddy mudpuddles. You only live once, right?

Next weekend is the Antique Tractor Show...more pictures to follow I'm sure. Actually, we are surprising him with Thomas Live on Stage on Wednesday, I almost forgot! A busy month!

Appendectomy In Pregnancy??

2009-05-14T23:00:00.001-04:00

It's been a while since I've posted, but I think I have a pretty good reason...

April 7th I began having some belly pain that I attributed to stress or nervousness about a meeting Frank & I were going to about doing background checks on children's workers at church. We went to the meeting and it went well. Well, aside from the crazy right sided abdominal pain...

When we picked Trey up from our friend's home, the pain seemed to get worse. I thought this was odd, since the meeting was over. I had Frank press on my belly to see what he thought and he had a certain look on his face. He had me take Tylenol and we would see if it got better.

We got to our house about 30 minutes later and the pain was not any better. Frank called my OB who thought it sounded like my gall bladder and said we should probably head to the hospital. So, we left for the hospital.

An gall bladder ultrasound was ordered for in the morning (because an u/s tech isn't there overnight). They started an IV and drew labs. I got pain medicine and was feeling better, however I was feeling crampy/contraction like pain in my lower abdomen. I was hooked up to a fetal monitor and was given Brethine to stop the contractions.

I was only 22 weeks along. Scary.

Frank and Trey were going to go home and come back in the morning...that is, until the contractions started. So the poor guys stayed the night with me.

The next morning my OB came in. We discussed the contractions, which she believed to just be uterine irritability. And she also ordered a CT Scan to check my appendix and consulted surgery. This was around 9am.

I had my gall bladder u/s and they also looked at my placenta, which was all normal.

The surgeon came in around noon. I had still not had my CT Scan. He proceeded to pull his cell phone out in my room and call radiology to find out why Mrs. C hadn't had her CT Scan. He proceeded to tell them that either we do the Scan or he would have to go in laproscopically to diagnose what was happening. The Scan was clearly the better option.

Now, let me be the first to say that radiology in pregnancy is not recommended. I am fully aware of that. I am aware that there could be some effects to the baby. HOWEVER, if my appendix burst and I die, then the baby would not live either. My OB, my doctor husband, and my surgeon all agreed that this was the best course of action.

Unfortunately, the radiologist was not comfortable doing the scan and needed a little "convincing" by the surgeon. My CT was done around 4:30pm. My OB came into the Radiology Dept after my scan and told me that it was my appendix.

I was wheeled into surgery around 5:30pm, put under and had a laproscopic appendectomy, while 22 weeks pregnant.

How amazing is that!?

My OB (who I LOVE) was in the surgery and I saw her before they put me under. The relief I felt can't be described to know that she was there to watch out for my baby. And she did a great job.

The surgeon, who spoke up for me when I couldn't, was awesome. There was some pus around my appendix, which definitely confirmed the fact the this needed to be done sooner versus later. Just the fact that he did it laproscopically is amazing. The recovery time was near nothing. I only took pain meds for less than a week.

We are so thankful that God has been watching out for us. We know that all of this was in His hands. It is just amazing.

I am now 27 weeks along and the baby is kicking me like crazy. I am so grateful for every one of those kicks...such reassurance.

So, that's where we've been...hopefully I'll get a belly picture on here soon. Oh, and ultrasound pics. I'm so behind!!

Trey's Top Ten (Okay, Eight...)

2009-03-30T08:30:00.000-04:00

Trey's Top Eight Reasons to Get Out of Bed

8. I need to take my vitamin.
(We really tried to think of everything the first night, but alas we forgot the vitamin.)

7. I'm cold.
(The poor thing usually sleeps in his underwear (his choice), but without his heater father, he was cold.)

6. Mommy, I want to tell you something.
(And I quote, "ah, um". Yea, he had nothing.)

5. I have to go potty.
(We'll give him credit...it was in the middle of the night and he went right back to bed.)

4. Daddy, the time isn't right on my Chevy clock.
(No, the child does not know how to tell time.)

3. I want to read a book. (At 2:30am)
(To which I told him, "Go for it". And he went back to bed and woke up with his Diggers book on the bed.)

2. I want to sleep with yooouuuuu. Tears flowing.

And the number 1 reason Trey uses to get out of bed:

1. Daddy, I can't sleep. Lightning McQueen is staring at me.
(So, Frank went to his room, removed the poster from the wall and turned it around toward the wall.)

He is doing great! He is making it easy on me, for which I am grateful. And he likes that McGwire (the dog) sleeps in his room with him.

Two is company, three's a crowd.

2009-03-27T15:45:00.002-04:00

Because of the circumstances of December 2007 Trey has been permanently camped out in our bed. And let me be the one to tell you, I permanently put him there. We had tried a few times to put him in his own bed, but the anxiety I felt was unbearable.

The ironic part of all of this is that I was the first person to tell anyone that children sleeping in their parent's bed was crazy. Yes, crazy. And here I am, 15 months into having a child sleeping in my bed.

It has become so convenient in so many ways. Because, just go ahead and try to put him in his bed. Yea, good luck with that. It's not pretty. And who do we have to blame for that? Huh? Who?

Yep...me.

But, you see, one thing I swore I would not let happen, is happening. I refuse to let this circumstance be a "crutch" for him. I refuse to let the abuse define who Trey is. And I as his mother need to stop. He is 4 years-old and needs to sleep in his own bed.

Frank and I need our bed back to ourselves. Yea, it's a king size bed, but not meant for 3 of us. We need a few hours in the evening to ourselves.

(The funny part of this picture is that Frank is all the way at the edge of his side of the bed. Trey is smack-dab next to him, with the entire king bed behind Trey. It really is craziness.)

So tonight is it! After some discussion and planning, Trey will be put in his bed tonight, SuperNanny style. I know it won't be easy, but it needs to be done. So, around 9 o'clock tonight, could ya say a little prayer for us. All three of us.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-03-25T12:30:00.000-04:00

Flowers From My Boy

2009-03-10T21:00:00.001-04:00

Spring is here...kinda. It was 70 degrees today, but it supposed to be 40 tomorrow. We took advantage of the nice weather and spent a little time outside today.

My sweet little guy was riding his new John Deere bike he got from his Grammy & Pappy.

Which he absolutely LOVES, by the way.

Well, he jumped off his bike and told me he'd be right back. He proceeded to run to the yard and came back with these:

What a sweet little guy. He then told me we could use these when Daddy and I get married. Hee, hee. I told him we already were and he said that no we aren't. I guess he wants to be there for the occasion! Love him.

What I needed to hear...

2009-03-05T12:00:00.001-05:00

I'm in a valley right now. Don't know why, exactly, but here I am. I met with Barbara yesterday and she asked me some pretty profound questions... How's your relationship with God? Do you think God is stripping you so you depend on Him alone? Why can't you let her go?

Lately, I have felt alone. And I just sit in my loneliness. Waiting for...I don't know what. Am I protecting myself? Protecting Trey? I am an extrovert...it's the way God made me and yet here I sit, by myself, at home for days. And wonder, why.

Then this morning I read Angie Smith's blog and here is an excerpt...referring to God.

Because I have no doubt that His hands, His HUGE hands make the sky and the earth and the planets and the stars and so on and so on.

But is it possible that those same hands can wrap themselves around something as small as a knife? Something so small as my day to day needs? My hurts? My fears and doubts? The situations that seem like nothing to those around me but keep me awake at night?

He can make the waters part. No problem. That makes sense to me. BIG hands. Got it.
He can resurrect His dead Son from a cross. That sounds about right- He is God after all. Logical.
But can He wrap those same hands around the "little things?"

As I sit here today I realize God is sitting waiting for me to ask Him to help me...that's all He wants. And yet I don't give Him the "little" things (by my definition).

Please, go to Angie's blog and read today's post. It will be worth it, I promise.

The Best Week Ever!

2009-02-21T17:00:00.000-05:00

Yep! The week of December 14th.

I've been told I should have played the lottery that week. Although, I've not ever played.

Remember back when we got the offer on the house? Our house that had been sitting on the market for over a year. Our house that had a ton of traffic through it, but had not had one offer. None. That was Wednesday, December 17th.

December 17th was also the day of Frank's Christmas party for work. And most of you know what happened last year. So needless-to-say, I was a little apprehensive. Everything went well and Trey had a blast.

Also, most of you know that I suffer from infertility. We tried for 5 years before finally doing our first attempt at in-vitro. We were given Trey through that attempt. Then in February 2008 we did our second attempt, which you can read about here.

On occasion I will have Frank get me a pregnancy test to take even if I'm a day late because, well, even after almost 10 years of infertility, the hope still remains. So, I'll take a test, it's negative, and I go on with my life.

(I'm sure you see where this is going...)

Well, the night of December 17th, I took a test. I left it in the bathroom, set the timer, got something to drink and just chilled. Frank and I don't even get excited, it's just like something I have to do. Well, I walked into the bathroom and sure enough...positive test. Frank's first words were, "I'll bring home another test tomorrow".

And sure enough...that one was positive too.

I called my reproductive endocrinologist and left a message for my IVF nurse. When she called me back her words were, "I have a message here that says you had a positive pregnancy test". I told her yes and I still don't think she believed me.

Let's be honest here. The odds of me getting pregnant on our own are like....nil, nada, not a chance. We always knew that with God, nothing is impossible and He has proved it in our lives.

We don't just do in-vitro...we do in-vitro with ICSI. Which means putting sperm & egg in the same place, letting them do their "thing", won't happen. They actually inject the sperm into the egg. So, God has once again shown His hand in our lives.

I am now 15 weeks along. I have been pretty sick. Not as sick as I was with Trey, but morning sickness is well, not fun. We are moved in, but with a few boxes still hanging around.

We are praising God for what we believe to be His blessings on us for being obedient to His will. The last year has not been easy for us, but we have earnestly sought out what HE wants us to do and how HE wanted us to handle everything. And He has poured out the blessing.

2009-02-11T15:30:00.006-05:00

A friend of mine sent this video and I wanted to share it with you...Enjoy!

What's Happening?

2009-02-03T18:00:00.000-05:00

Boy, have things been crazy around here lately.

My car is still in the shop...supposed to be done by Friday. So, we're praying that's the case.

My in-laws have been here visiting for the last week and have been a HUGE help. They helped us finish moving out of the apartment and cleaning it. They also pretty much unpacked my entire kitchen...which is AWESOME. And...since I was without a car, it was great to have them here for an extra car. Trey had a blast. He laughed so much and so hard this week. I am truly grateful for my inlaws.

Trey's 4th birthday was January 20th. We took him to Toys R Us and he got the royal treatment. He had money from my grandma to pick out whatever he wanted...so needless-to-say, he definitely enjoyed himself. He picked out two "Thomas" trains he wanted. I can't believe we paid $46 for 2 wooden trains. But, he loves them.

We haven't had his birthday party with family yet. We are to travel back to NE Ohio where our extended families live this weekend (hence, the need for my car to be done) for his party. He wanted a John Deere party (surprise, surprise) and we are having it at the Dairy Queen. He's really excited to see his cousins.

Well, I have lots more I want to blog about...in due time. Hopefully I will have pictures of the party to post next week.

Also...most importantly, could you please pray for my friend Melissa? She is finishing up her chemo for her bone marrow (stem cell) transplant. The actual transplant is Thursday. You can check out her blog here. Thanks so much.

While I've been gone...

2009-01-23T14:00:00.001-05:00

Well, today is the first day I actually have internet access at home. The little bit I've been online has been from my families homes. So, I thought you like to see what I've been up to while I've been out...

My front bumper

Passenger side front bumper (excuse the green glove in the corner)

Passenger side front fender

Passenger side rear bumper/fender

Yep, you guessed. Trey and I went for a little "ride". We were on our way to my sister's house and hit a patch of snow. We hit a guard rail on the passenger's side first and then landed the driver's side in the ditch.

Praise God we are and were just fine. Trey wanted his Daddy (and I did too). A nice guy with a 4x4 Chevy pulled us out of the ditch and the State Highway Patrolman was really good to us.

Now we'll be taking it in for a little cosmetic work.

It's good to be back!!

Checking In...

2009-01-05T14:00:00.000-05:00

No, I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. Well, it seems like I have.

There was Christmas and traveling and packing and closing on our house and moving and...

So, I just wanted to let you know I am still here. We don't have internet at our new home we are renting until Friday.

Hope your New Year is great and hope to catch up soon! I have some exciting news!

Merry Christmas From My Family To Yours!

2008-12-25T00:01:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas to all!

Our prayer is that you all experience the

season for what is really to be celebrated!

God sent his son Jesus as the ultimate present.

God bless you and your family.

One Year Ago Today...

2008-12-18T19:00:00.002-05:00

Was the day someone we trusted hurt our child.

It's weird to think that a year has gone by...doctor's appointments, child protective services, meetings with the prosecutor, and the trial.

One year ago since, in essence, I lost the relationship with my best friend of 10 years.

Our second in-vitro attempt and then miscarriage...

All of this and yet, I can say that God is good. He has been there everyday. Has it always been easy? Absolutely not. But, He has blessed us. We have learned so much about Him and grown so much closer to Him.

Trey is happy and healthy. We just sold our house after a year of it being on the market. God is blessing us.

The last few days we have been in Cincinnati for Frank to have some training. You see, a few months ago, a letter came across his desk stating that the Child Abuse Physician at the hospital he works for is no longer there and they are seeking a replacement. They were wondering if any physicians in Frank's group were interested.

Frank really felt that it was something he should check into. We believe that God is using our situation with Trey to help others. Frank agreed to take the job. It's only 2 half days a month at this point.

What greater person to see patients who are victims of abuse than a father whose son was abused? Just another way we are seeing God work in this otherwise terrible situation.

You can check out the first parts of Trey's story here and I am working on finishing up the rest of the posts soon.

Family Pictures

2008-12-15T10:00:00.000-05:00

I ~~forced~~ convinced Frank it was time to get family pictures taken again. It's been a while and Trey seems to be getting over his picture-taking issues. He (Frank) went along with it ~~screaming~~ happy as can be.

Well, I think they came out great!

Of course, I could definitely be a bit (ha!) thinner. :)

My little guy's 4 year pictures. He's the cutest ever!! I am not biased at all.

Mr. Stoic. He cracks me up!

This is my FAVORITE!! It captures his personality better than any picture he's ever taken. One of God's greatest gifts to me.

Please Pray...

2008-12-12T17:00:00.000-05:00

My friend Melissa received some news regarding her lymphoma yesterday.

Please go to her blog and pray, pray, pray. I know she and her family would appreciate it.

www.danceintherainmelissa.blogspot.com

Melissa, our hearts are heavy for you...we love you and believe with you that God is bigger than this!

Special Prayer Request

2008-12-10T12:00:00.003-05:00

**Update #2**

As of 5:30pm the buyers accepted our counter!! So, provided our home inspection, etc., goes well, we will close sometime the middle of January!! Thanks so much for your prayers during this time. God is doing great things in our lives!

**Update**

We countered their offer yesterday afternoon. Then, this morning they countered back. We were hoping they would accept it, but in this market...well, it's a buyer's market. So, we just offered our counter back, which we believe is the best... So please continue to pray.

Remember this post??

Well, this morning I received a phone call from our realtor. He got a call to place an offer on our house last night. The offer is pretty low. It's our first offer EVER. We have lowered our price over $10k during this year. The market stinks!

BUT...we are trusting God. He knows what is best for us. He knows how we are so ready to stop making a payment on a house we haven't lived in for almost a year and buy a house where we are now. He knows I'm soo tired of living in a 2 bedroom duplex with only half of our belongings.

So, please pray with us. Pray for the buyers. Pray for the realtors. Pray for us that we would make a wise decision.

I'll keep you updated!

My Rudolph

2008-12-09T14:00:00.002-05:00

Meet Rudolph...

Yep, the crazy child asked me to stick the red "pom pom" on his nose.

All of this after he stuck a small white ~~snowball~~ pom pom up his nose. After trying to get it out with my finger, I finally convinced him to "blow" it out. Oh the joy of boys.

He is soo excited for Christmas. Every time it snows he says, "It's Christmas!!". I love it. He makes me feel like a kid again. And I love having the opportunity to talk to him about the real present of Christmas...Jesus.

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

2008-12-03T16:00:00.001-05:00

Things are crazy around here these days. But, I wanted to post a few pics of whats been happening around here.

Trey and I made a construction paper chain to count down the days until Christmas.

Trey + Scissors = Mess.

Trey and his Daddy at our friend Linn's house. Trey cheeesing, of course.

We got our family pictures taken on Monday. They came out soo good. Hope to get them posted soon.

Have a great rest of the week!!

Things We Cannot Do Without...

2008-11-24T21:30:00.003-05:00

As we all know, times are tough these days. So, I've been trying to cut corners where I can. Some things work out, some - not so much. Frank and I have been discussing what household items can be "substituted" with an off-brand and which ones shall never be touched.

Here is what we've come up with:

Dishwashing detergent: There is NO substitute for Dawn. None.

American cheese slices: Hubby says Kraft Singles only.

Toilet paper: No sandpaper for this families booties.

Toothpaste: Crest only baby!!

Tennis shoes: There is something to be said about comfortable shoes. Nike, NB, whatever. If you've found some that are as great, but cheaper, let me know!!

Well, this is just a few of our things.

Your turn. What items have to be a certain brand for you and your family??

MckMama's Small Fry

2008-11-22T09:15:00.000-05:00

Check out MckMama's blog (for those of you who don't already) and read the awesome story about what God has done and is doing in her families life!

It's really been such a blessing to me during our recent tough times...God is good.

Two More Months and He'll Be 4!

2008-11-19T16:00:00.000-05:00

Just for kicks!

2008-11-18T14:59:00.001-05:00

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

I'm Twittering!!

2008-11-18T13:00:00.000-05:00

Okay, so now I'm twittering...we'll see how it goes and how good I am at keeping it updated.

Please feel free to follow me. You'll find what we are up to on the right side bar of my blog.

Enjoy! (We really aren't that exciting!)

Time With Friends

2008-11-14T14:00:00.001-05:00

Trey and I head south to our old stomping grounds about 3 times a month. We always enjoy getting to see some of our friends. One of my best friends, Susan, and her kids are always fun to get together with and Trey enjoys playing with his friends.

Trey and Avery going down the slide. They used to have a love/hate relationship. They are much better now. However, they do act like an old married couple. She knows exactly how to push his buttons. (You'll have to ask me about our Cici's Pizza experience.)

I love this picture. He has his father's fear of heights, so if he went too high a look of concern came over his face. He was having a blast.

Avery, on the other hand, is crazy. No fear. She would shake her booty side-to-side as she was swinging. She is too cute.

The big boys were running all over the place so I had to "make" them all sit together to actually get a picture of them. Devin in blue, Brice in green, Trey and Avery.

Trey loves his friends and looks forward to playing with them. Hope to do it again soon!

On a side note, Susan is one of my very best friends. She was there for me during the trial like you wouldn't believe. She helped me work through so much during this time and I don't know what I would do without her. Love ya, Sus!

More of the story... (Part 3)

2008-11-10T08:00:00.001-05:00

We went over to Frank's partner's neighbor's home, where she so graciously offered us to stay, while she was visiting her daughter out of town. Before we went to bed, I changed Trey's diaper and noticed some red marks and bruises. I called Frank to look at it and he said it was probably from sliding down the stairs. I didn't feel great about that. But I will tell you that I am totally an over-reactor and Frank is an under-reactor. We tend to meet in the middle and we agreed to wait until the a.m.

(Side bar) I know what you're thinking... What in the world??? Why didn't you take him somewhere? Call someone? --- We were told a story...we had no reason to think that this was anything more than what we were told. These were people we knew and trusted. The story seemed consistent at the time. Hind sight is 20/20 and what I would do to know then what I know now. (End of side bar)

Well, after a terrible night of sleep...we got up and headed to Frank's office. I didn't even take a shower. I went and showed the physician's assistant Trey's butt as soon as we got there. It was worse that morning than it had been the night before. She confirmed our feelings that it was more than an accident from sliding down the stairs.

An x-ray of Trey's right forearm revealed 2 fractures. His radius and his ulna were BOTH broken. I will never forget the look of that x-ray in my life. We were sent to an orthopedist who told us that Trey would have to have surgery to complete the break of his ulna so it would heal properly. We returned to Frank's office to wait until it was time for the surgery.

Frank's partner showed up at the office. He also happens to be the county coroner. He & his wife took pictures of all the marks/bruises on Trey. It was the most horrifying thing to experience. After he was done photographing Trey, he showed me on Trey's butt where a handprint could be seen. I thought I was going to throw up.

At 2pm on December 19th, Trey underwent surgery. Child protective services (CPS) was called. They took pictures again of Trey's injuries. The police department was called to file a report. CPS instructed us to take Trey to a Children's Hospital to be checked out from head-to-toe.

He had labs drawn to make sure he didn't have a clotting disorder and that his platelets were normal. Everything came back stone-cold normal. He was x-rayed from the top of his head to his toes. They were all normal. The child mal-treatment specialist was consulted. We were to follow up with CPS in our home county. We also followed up with the child mal-treatment specialist.

That night when we got home from Children's ER, we snuggled in our bed with Trey. I asked Trey what happened to him and he proceeded to tell me... "I fell on the dog, ...spanked my butt, he got loud, because I was crying...I wanted you, he threw me on the couch." (my paraphrase) Once again, ready to vomit.

(More soon...I know, long story. Tell me about it, I lived it.)

Here's Looking At You Kid!

2008-11-07T17:30:00.000-05:00

Have a great weekend!!

Wow! Two posts in one day!!

2008-11-05T18:00:00.002-05:00

But this one is worth it!!

Check out Pete's blog regarding this post-election time.
I think he says it best.

It is time to move on...

Check out this stuff!!

2008-11-05T10:00:00.001-05:00

Decorating for Halloween is not normally my thing. It's not that I have a problem with Halloween, I just am cheap and don't like to spend a lot of money on it. I prefer to spend my money on "Fall" decorations, "Harvesty", "Autumn" stuff.

Well, yesterday Trey and I were at Wally World to pick up a few household items. And lo and behold they were selling all of their left over Halloween stuff for 10 cents a piece. Yes, that's right, a dime, two nickles, 10 pennies. You heard me right.

So, being the bargain shopper my mother raised me to be, of course I took advantage. Check out this stuff:

Spider web makin' stuff, caution tape, $5 Darth Vader voice breathing thing, tarantulas...

Tissue paper, pumpkin carving tools/stencils, $7 batman gloves, a broom...

All for 10 cents a piece!! As I say, "A bargain isn't a bargain unless you tell someone". So, now you know!!

By the way...full price for these things total $48.00 and I paid $1.70. Can't beat that!

Have you ever found great deals like this before??

Halloween!

2008-11-02T18:30:00.000-05:00

This year was really fun with Trey. He was soo excited to carve a pumpkin. And of course, trick or treating was really fun! So here are a few pics from the week.

Trey the elephant.

At the nursing home trick or treating.

Optimus Prime.

The loot.

Please Pray for Melissa

2008-10-28T19:00:00.001-04:00

I've talked before about my friend Melissa. One of my best friends.

She has Non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. After 6 treatments of out-patient chemotherapy, the lymphoma is continuing to grow. As of yesterday, she was admitted to the hospital for 5 days of in-patient chemotherapy.

This means that her three kids, Caleb-5, Lauren-3, and Audrey-1, and her husband, Doug, are at home while she is receiving her chemo. They do have an awesome family who is there helping out.

If you would, please, say a prayer for Melissa. Pray that the chemo eradicates the cancer. Pray that she would not experience side effects from the chemo. Please pray for Doug and the kids. I know she would appreciate and so do I.

You can check out her blog here for updates and to see pictures of her and her family. It's always nice to put a face with a name.

Thank you for your prayers.

Church Hunting

2008-10-25T10:30:00.001-04:00

Ok, overall I really dislike church hunting. We were perfectly satisfied with this guy's church. But, an hour is a little long to drive to church. :)

But, I will say the #1 reason to like church hunting is....

Yep, friendship bread. I wish I could say the loaf still looked like this. Trey and I have chowed down. God bless the little old lady who delivered this to my dear hubby while he was under the car changing the oil.

The Beginning of the Story... (Part 2)

2008-10-22T21:30:00.003-04:00

December 18, 2007 - My husband's Christmas party for his new job.

Not us, but you get the point.

We needed a sitter for Trey and of course, the likely people, would be our friend's parents. They loved Trey like their grandchild. Well, they were out of town, but my friend told me she thought her sister and brother-in-law would be willing to watch him. We worked it out.

We drove the hour drive with Frank that morning and dropped him off at work. Trey and I went to Frank's new partner's house and hung out with his wife for the day. It was a good time to get to know each other better. Such sweet people.

When Frank was finished at work, Trey and I picked him up and left to take Trey to the sitters. Plans had somewhat changed in that my friend's sister would not be there when we dropped him off, she had their teenage son at a doctor's appointment.

Trey was a little cranky when we left him...he had fallen asleep on the way, since he didn't get a nap during the day. We told our friend's brother-in-law to call if he needed anyting.

I called to check on Trey when we arrived at the party about an hour after we dropped him off. I was told he fell over their chocolate lab and was crying. I told the brother-in-law to call me if he didn't settle down. We never heard another word.

We rode with Frank's partner and his wife to the party and so they took us to pick up Trey. This was around 10 o'clock. I went in to get Trey and when he saw me, he immediately started crying and came to me. He told me his arm hurt.

Almost immediately, my friend's brother-in-law asked me if Trey liked to slide down the stairs on his butt. I thought this was odd and told him he only does it at our house to get from one floor to another and we live in a tri-level, so there's only 6 stairs at a time. He then told me that Trey must have slid down their stairs a million times. He also said that he and their teenage son had slid down the stairs too. Weird, for a 35 year-old man, for sure.

I told Trey that his Daddy would look at his arm when we returned to Frank's partner's house. He really fussed about it. The brother-in-law walked me out to the car and while I put Trey in the car he asked Frank about the stairs and a few other odd questions. Trey refused to hug him goodbye or even give him high-5.

When we returned to Frank's partner's house, we took off Trey's sweatshirt for his arm to be looked at. We all noticed some red marks on his shoulder/neck. Frank and his partner both checked out Trey's arm and said there was swelling. Their thoughts were maybe he sprained it while playing and we also attributed the red marks to playing. If his arm was not better after motrin and a nights sleep we would x-ray it in the morning.

(to be continued...)

Click here for Part 3.

Blogging hiatus

2008-10-20T21:00:00.000-04:00

Not that I blog all that often, but I'm going out of town for a few days.

I'll be traveling the 3.5 hours to spend a little quality time with these.

Don't miss me too much!

Fire Station

2008-10-19T22:00:00.003-04:00

Thursday mornings are story time at the library. Trey and I are not early birds, but we make it when we can. One Thursday they were going to the Fire Station.

Trey was really excited!

So, we actually got there on time and everybody was ready to walk the block from the library to the Fire Station. A fireman gave us the tour of the office and then the upstairs where the fireman hang out, eat and sleep. Trey was NOT impressed by any of this. He kept asking me, "where are the firetrucks?". He was, however, very intrigued by the fireman pole.

So, after what seemed like days went by

(according to Trey),
we finally got to go down to the garage.

Excuse the bluriness, the child refuses to stand still and have his picture taken.

You can see the fireman pole behind him.

The fireman did slide down the pole for us,

causing multiple children to start crying. Good stuff!

Here you can see the lights are on, which he loved.

The ladder truck, his favorite...and he loved the dually tires.
(Yes, my crazy child knows what dually tires are.)

So, overall, the trip to the Fire House was a success.
We then traveled back to the library for story time about firemen and firetrucks. Love the library!!

Before And After

2008-10-15T23:45:00.006-04:00

The mohawk... I loved the mohawk. He was sooo cute and really, lets face it, when he gets much older it won't be so cute. And, he quit letting us spike it up so it was really looking pretty bad.

So, he wanted his hair to look like his daddy's. And he got his wish.

Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.

National Day of Remembrance for Infant and Pregnancy Loss

2008-10-15T00:00:00.003-04:00

We did our second attempt of in-vitro fertilization February 22, 2008. We were overjoyed to find out we were pregnant.

We found out at our second ultrasound that our baby was no longer viable. No heartbeat could be found. We were devastated. I was about 7 weeks along.

I underwent a D&C on March 28, 2008. I would be due on November 12, 2008. I think about this baby often. And I'm sure that November will be a hard time.

I want to always remember my second child, who is safe in God's arms.

If you have ever lost a child, check out Angie's post here.

How did we get here?? (Part 1)

2008-10-13T22:30:00.003-04:00

A few blog readers have asked about the story to which I allude to surrounding my son's abuse. Because of the trial and other things, I have waited until now to tell the story. No names will be given. This is only meant to tell Trey's story...

Frank & I have been married for 11 years. Most of those years have been lived in a larger, metropolitan area, where Frank attended medical school and completed his residency in Family Practice. Let me tell you...I am ALL about the city.

We had opened our own family practice and that lasted for about 2 and a half years. We opened it 2 weeks after Trey was born. Yikes! It was actually a great time in our lives. We didn't have many patients at the beginning, and so we all three got to spend lots of newborn time together.

And here, he thinks he runs the place. :)

Well, after 2 and a half years of living paycheck to paycheck and not seeing the practice growing as we expected, and Frank was moonlighting at an Urgent Care to make ends meet, we decided to close in November of 2007.

We wanted to be open to where God wanted us to go and assumed there was something in this metropolitan area for Frank. However, the places that were sent our way were at least 45 minutes away to about 2 and a half hours away in a neighboring state.

One of the places, which we found out through my friend's father, was about an hour north of this metropolitan area. Farm country, town of about 9500 people...not my cup of tea. After interviewing, we both really felt the Lord was leading us there.

And, as you can see, Trey fits right in here in farmland!

Well, my friend was from this new area we were moving to. We have been friends for about 10 years. Frank and I felt such a peace about this move, especially knowing that our friend's parents/family lived within 15 minutes of our new location. How awesome God is. These people were like family to us.

We were unsure as to when we would be able to move up north. We had (and still have) a home for sale in our old stomping grounds.

Anyone need to buy a house???

Frank started part-time November 30th and then full-time as of January 2, 2008. He drove the hour commute during this time.

And this is where the story begins...

Click here for Part 2.

Not Me! Monday

2008-10-12T23:15:00.001-04:00

Okay, this is my first time...we'll see how it goes.

I did NOT do 10 loads of laundry (including every blanket we own) just because we bought a new washer and dryer. I HATE laundry and would never do that.

I did NOT get jealous when another mom at Story Time at the library asked for another mom's phone number and not mine. I am soo not a jealous person. I have lots of friends...

I did NOT make my husband take Trey to the office to check his ears, mouth, nose, throat & lungs TWICE over the weekend to make sure he doesn't have an infection since he has a fever. I am NOT an over-protective mom who doubts her doctor husband. :)

Okay, that's it. Hopefully not too terrible for my first time. What did YOU not do this week?

Check out the "original" Not Me! Monday creator - MckMama.

On a lighter note...

2008-10-09T18:30:00.001-04:00

Two Saturdays a month Lowes has a kids clinic.

You can take your child and they create something with a hammer, nails, wood and even stickers sometimes. The kids get a Lowes apron, nametag, protective eye wear and patches for each project they complete. And it's all FREE!!

Trey has made a photo frame, spider, tape measure, fire engine, GMC truck...just to name a few. He loves it! And to be honest, Frank does too.

Daddy & Trey workin' hard.

Team Work!

The finished product...a firetruck! And two happy guys!

They love doing it and I love watching them. It's great father and son time. However, I have seen quite a few girls and mommies building stuff too!!

This coming Saturday, October 11th is the next one here at our Lowes.

It's a skeleton...

Pretty cool, huh?

Have any of you made anything at Lowes???

The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

2008-10-08T23:30:00.001-04:00

Let me just say this, first of all...which I believe you can't fully understand until you have been through the court system. The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth does not necessarily get to be revealed in court. There are certain things that are "not admissible" that we believe add incredibly to a case...specifically, prior offenses.

The justice system wants to look at each and every incident that one has with the "law" as just that...one incident. As our prosecutor told us, "If you rob Bank A on Monday and Bank B on Tuesday, when you are tried in court for Bank B, they cannot bring up Bank A". I say, "crazy". I understand if they are not related...like writing bad checks and assault, fine, but if they are in the same line, I think the judge/jury should be aware. BUT, that's not how it works and ultimately, that's okay.

I am in no way saying that the truth was not presented. That is what we prayed for and we believe it was expressed as best it could. And we chose not to offer a plea bargain because we felt that the truth needed to be expressed. Win or lose. Reasonable doubt is a sticky thing and we knew that going in. Our attorney friend said, "Unfortunately in criminal law the standard is so high, the 'beyond reasonable doubt', it is so unfortunate".

We can only look back on this situation and say that we did EVERYTHING we could to make this right. No regrets. Our Trey is as awesome today as he was 1 week ago. Our God is the same today as he was before December 18, 2007.

"God is NOT happy." ~Barbara

2008-10-07T23:30:00.000-04:00

Well, as you can imagine, today was a little rough. Just trying to process it all. I woke up feeling like, "now what do I do?". The case seemed to take up a lot of my thoughts, time, etc. Shouldn't I be calling Sam to find out how it's going? Pursuing justice for Trey...a full-time job.

I had already scheduled an appointment with Barbara (my counselor for those of you who are new) for today. I was looking forward to it, but had a hard time getting up and ready. I knew she would give me great, godly perspective. And, yep, that's what she did.

I told her about the trial, how it was 3 days long. Whew. Then I told her the verdict and saw her disappointment. Her husband is a magistrate, so she knows about the court system. We had talked previously about the possibilities, guilty or not, and I'm sure she was prepared for either.

I told her how I felt like all of the sudden it was done. No justice. Now what do I do? I'm sure God's disappointed, but we did all we could do...

Then, she grabbed her Bible. (I LOVE her!!)

She told me that God is not happy. He wants the TRUTH and the truth did not come out.

Aquitting the guilty and condemning the innocent - the Lord detests them both.
~Proverbs 17:15

I told her how I didn't understand how the defendant has gotten away with so many different things.

If a man pays back evil for good, evil will never leave his house.
~Proverbs 17:13

She said that God is not done with this situation. I then realized I was limiting God. He is NOT done with this situation. Just because this part of it has ended doesn't mean that God is done with it. Now, I need to put it in His hands. His timing is not mine.

Oh, and she broke out the Psalms. I am loving Psalms these days.

Be sure to check out all of Psalm 55. (Wow, was God in our court room? "His speech is smooth as butter, yet war is in his heart." v21.

Here's some of it...

22Cast your cares on the LORD
and he will sustain you;
he will never let the righteous fall.

23 But you, O God, will bring down the wicked
into the pit of corruption;
bloodthirsty and deceitful men
will not live out half their days.

But as for me, I trust in you.

But as for me, I trust in You.

Not Guilty

2008-10-06T20:50:00.008-04:00

Just because a person is found not guilty by reasonable doubt, does not mean that they did not commit the crime.

Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. ~Romans 12:19

Trial (Day 2...and 3)

2008-10-04T21:00:00.001-04:00

Well, the trial continued through Friday.

It will resume Monday at 8am.

Keep on praying!!

God is good!

The Trial

2008-10-01T21:00:00.003-04:00

At 9 o'clock in the morning, we will be heading to the courthouse.

Jury selection is first. Then the trial begins.

Finally, the time we have waited for, for nearly 10 months.

Please keep us in your prayers. The jury, the attorneys, the judge, the witnesses...the TRUTH.

That's all we want. The TRUTH.

We trust in our God. We are in his hands.

High Heels for Babies??

2008-09-30T14:10:00.000-04:00

Well, after reading Angie's blog at Bring the Rain about little girl's panties being a little on the low-rise, thong, bikini end, I came across these.

Yep, high heels for babies. Wow.

According to the website, heelarious shoes are..."extremely funny, completely soft shoes for babies 0-6 months designed to look like high heels. Not intended for walking (heel will collapse with weight). Not intended to harm children in any way".

While I am sure they are cute, funny, whatever, I'm afraid it, too, just makes the little girls of the world a little more grown up than they should be.

Just thought I'd let you all in on the newest trends for your little girls.

The Big Picture

2008-09-25T20:16:00.003-04:00

God sees it. I don't. I'm not supposed to. But, I REALLY want to.

God knew what was going to happen today, before it happened. I have to thank him for proving himself over and over.

The pending trial, the details of the case, whether the truth will actually be told by the defendant...God already knows. I just need to take a deep breath and remember that.

It's so not my personality. I don't sit back and wait. I am type A all the way. To a fault. But, it's the way God made me. I just have to make sure I use my personality in the right way.

On another note, a few people have asked for more details about the abuse. I have a great desire to put the information out here in blog-land, but that would be irresponsible of me at this point. The case is still pending and the defense attorney is well aware this blog exists. So, in due time, all things will be revealed.

One week from today is the trial...please pray. Pray for Sam, our prosecutor, that discouraging words would not get him down. Pray for jury selection...this is huge!

Pray for the defendant...he needs it most of all.

Go Buckeyes!

2008-09-24T21:00:00.001-04:00

No, I'm not talking about the "real" nut buckeye...although seeing these make me hungry thinking of chocolate and peanut butter buckeyes.

Frank & I went to the Ohio State football game this weekend. You know that if you're born in Ohio you are born a Buckeye. :)

We went with Richard & Jennifer, friends of ours from our previous church. It was good to spend some time with them...I've been missing close friends these days. No kids, either, just us 4 adults. I can't tell you the last time that's happened.

I'm sure some of you have seen this picture. They say it's proof that Jesus is a Buckeye fan. I'm not too sure about that...

"Jesus" is located in Monroe, Ohio, between Dayton and Cincinnati. A million dollars or so I hear...but don't get me started on that.

Just being at the "shoe" is an experience in itself. It's an awesome stadium. And we had been given an alumni's season tickets, so our seats were great! No nosebleed for us.

Being in a stadium with 102,000 other Buckeye fans was so cool. There is a little-bitty spot of maybe 100 seats for the opposing team, but I can't imagine sitting in THAT spot. It's not even like going to an NFL game. The city of Cincinnati isn't full of Bengals fans, that's for sure.

Here's the picture of us, sweating to death. We had a really good time. We walked forever to get to the stadium and got to spend time talking without interruption. It was good to spend time with my hubby...we need to do it more often.

Thanks for the tickets and good time, Rich & Jennifer.

Forgivness is NOT a Feeling.

2008-09-17T23:00:00.000-04:00

Forgiveness.

What does that mean? I don't know about you but, I think I associated forgiveness with a feeling or emotion. Or an automatic or expected response to an apology.

According to dictionary.com:

forgive:
1. to grant pardon for or remission of (an offense, debt, etc.); absolve.
2. to give up all claim on account of; remit (a debt, obligation, etc.).
3. to cease to feel resentment against: to forgive one's enemies.

Well, after spending some time with my good friend Barbara, and spending time in God's Word. I have a new definition and understanding of what God intends for forgiveness.

Forgiveness is NOT a feeling.

Forgivness is not an OPTION, but an act of obedience to the will of God.
**Wow!! This is HUGE.**
Eph 4:32 - Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, as in Christ God forgave you.

Forgiveness is my responsibility and is not a natural response.
**Remember "seventy times seven"??

Forgiveness means to give up the offense and not get back at the offender.
Romans 12:19 - Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay" says the Lord.

Forgiveness gives the vengeance over to God.
**See above.**

Forgivness allows emotional freedom & healing.
**Praise the Lord!!**

Forgiveness is exemplified in the life of Jesus.
Luke 23:34

The ideal situation for forgiveness is between two people. Lovingly confronting, repent, reconcile, be accountable, etc.

The non-ideal situation (only one party participating) is between only you and God. Acknowledging the sin or hurt, decide to forgive, ask God to bless the offender (whew!), etc.

What I've learned is that it doesn't always involve two people to forgive. I don't have to wait for someone to apologize to me for me to forgive them. God doesn't want me to hold on to it. If we hold on to it, God cannot deal with it.

I am soo imperfect and soo unworthy of God's forgiveness. I am not a perfect person. "As much as it depends on me, I WANT to live at peace with all men." (my paraphrase) God wants a good life for me and he is giving me emotional freedom & healing.

Thank you Barbara for all your prayers and counseling. God is using you to minister to me more than you will ever know.

Please pray for me as I work through all of these things. You either get bitter or better.

Baggage

2008-09-12T11:00:00.000-04:00

Oh, how I wished I lived in Nashville. I would be at CrossPoint Church in a heartbeat!! After being a part of a church plant and LOVING it, then moving to a small town where there aren't a lot of options for churches...I am soo loving www.withoutwax.tv. So, here's your shout out, Pete!

Anyway, they are doing a series called "Baggage". Wow! I've been to my counselor a few times now and we are dealing with just that. She helped me pray forgiveness for those who have hurt me and it was DEEP. Then, I came across this video on CrossPoint's Pastor's blog.

Baggage from Pete Wilson on Vimeo.

Anyway, check it out and let me know what you think...

Counseling...

2008-09-07T09:53:00.000-04:00

Since the abuse in December I have not went to see a counselor. My mom kept telling me I needed to go and I think somewhere inside of me knew I should, but "always in control" Jocelyn, thought I will...later.

I don't have any "preconceived" ideas about counseling. Actually, in the words of the great "Pastor Robbie", "Counseling is not failure". I know this. My Dad is a counselor. But, I just kept putting it off.

You see, it's no easy task to find a counselor, let alone the "right" one. It usually takes a long time to get a first appointment. And...how do you know it it's a "fit". I want christian counseling, but how do you find that and what does that mean.

Frank and I have been to marriage counseling early in our marriage. We went to a "Christian" counselor, but didn't receive christian counseling. Let me explain. The counselor we saw was yes, a christian. Did we feel like her counseling was infused with what the Bible said about the topics?? Not so much.

So, therein lies my problem. But WAIT then, enter Barbara...

My friend Susan told me of a counselor she knew of at a church. This woman did not go to that specific church, but was employed by the church to offer counseling to the church and the general public.

Susan told me of Barbara and things she had been told about Barbara's counseling. "She tells you what the Bible says about it." "She prays with you."
I thought, "no way, this has to be too good to be true". Plus Barbara is an hour away from where we live now.

So Frank and I talked about what I should do. There is a counselor 15 minutes away from where we live that I could go to. But, I told him I felt like I was supposed to see Barbara. I asked him what he thought. My dear Frank-o told me he wanted me to see Barbara. That if I felt like that's where I felt I should go, then go. Love him!

So, long story short...I was placed on the "dreaded" waiting list. I'm not sure how long I was on it, but there were definitely times I thought the trial would be over and done with before I got in to see Barbara. But, lo and behold, the Lord is good and I saw Barbara on August 11th.

I have never been to a counselor like this (not that I frequent them). I was not told her opinion about how to handle things or what to do, but she grabbed her Bible and told me what God says I should do. WOW! We pray together. She is so wise.

I'll definitely be posting more about the changes the Lord is doing in my life. I'm excited to share them with you. If this tells you anything about it...my husband texted me one day, "I love Barbara. I think she's exactly what you need".

Love you Barbara, Love you Frank!

Meet Linnea...

2008-09-04T22:00:00.001-04:00

Cal, Trey & Linnea

One of the biggest blessings in my family's life.
Really, a third (well, actually 6th) grandma to Trey.
She kept Trey for us when we owned our own business.
She has been a prayer warrior and awesome confidant in my life.
Her selflessness is amazing.

We miss her (and Cal, too) so much since we've moved up north. We miss playing Sequence and hanging out...and Frank misses her cooking, of course.

Honestly one of the very few people I could leave Trey with after the abuse.
He loves playing at Linnie's house and going to Linnie's school. :)

Well, Linnie has started her own business.
She is a great seamstress and very creative.
She makes purses, bags & scrapbook items.

You can check out her "store" here...

www.linneascreations.etsy.com

Love ya Linnie and hopefully we can get together soon!

Please Pray for my Pap...

2008-09-03T21:53:00.003-04:00

**Update**
Pap came through the procedure well. Two places in his arteries are back to 100% working order. There are a few other areas of concern that will be dealt with later. Thanks for your prayers.

My grandfather is having femoral artery stents placed tomorrow. He has not been in the hospital since the 1950s. He is 75 years-old.

Please pray for the physicians and staff, that God would guide them.

Pray that the procedure would go smoothly as possible.

Please pray that he would not be anxious.

Pray for my grandma as she patiently waits. And for my Dad, aunt & uncles, as well.

Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall. ~Psalm 55:22

Siblings Part 1

2008-08-31T23:00:00.000-04:00

I have a little brother. Okay, I have a younger brother. He is definitely taller than me. He is the youngest of the three of us. He's been that little pain in the butt brother, but has grown to be one of my closest friends. I'm really surprised at how close we are. Not because we didn't get along when we were younger, just we have different points of view on a lot of things.

All three of us are close as adults. We don't always agree on everything, but who does? We seem to agree to disagree, for the most part. When it comes down to it, if I needed something...he's there. And I hope he knows the same about me.

He just recently moved to Columbus, about an hour or more away. (Versus 2 minutes down the road.) We definitely want what's best for him. We miss him terribly. Yes, Rob, we really do.

Trey really misses his Uncle Rob. But he really enjoys playing Guitar Hero with him when he is here. Uncle Rob even gave him a guitar of his very own! They are best buds.

Well, little brother, we miss you now that you've moved to the "big city" (can you take me with you?). But, we definitely want you to be happy! Come and visit soon!

Subpoenas!!

2008-08-22T15:25:00.002-04:00

Well, the sheriff visited Frank's office today. OUR SUBPOENAS HAVE BEEN SERVED!!! Who would have thought that we would be excited to be subpoenaed? October 2nd is coming, ready-or-not. I'm so ready for it. I have such a peace about it. I'll have to let you know later where I found this peace...(it has to do with forgiveness.) Anyway...just wanted to get that off my chest.

Mohawk For Vacation and Time in Indy!

2008-08-21T23:00:00.000-04:00

Trey has been asking for a mohawk for a while. It's crazy...he's 3 years-old. But, we're going on vacation, so we decided a mohawk would be cool for vacation. Well, we cut it tonight and I think he looks so darn cute!

So, I guess we'll be applying sunscreen to the scalp next week while we're at the beach. Oh well, you only live once. I figure when he's 14 and rebelling, wanting a mohawk I can tell him, he's already had one. :)

Oh and by the way, we spent some of this week with Melissa in Indianapolis...

Is he hugging her or choking her? Good question. With Trey & Lauren, it varies minute by minute. The best was when they would argue over who was the boss. She also came and told me that Trey wasn't doing what she was telling him to do. They really are going to get married some day!!

Trey & Caleb eating lunch... They really enjoyed each other's company. Caleb asked that when we come back we not only bring Frank, but McGwire the dog too. I'm so glad I got to spend time with you all.

One Man's Junk Is Another Man's Treasure...

2008-08-17T09:00:00.000-04:00

My sister and I had a lot of "stuff" or junk as our husbands would say. And Valerie & I knew we wanted to have a garage sale. I had taken a few of my things to a friends house here where we live to add to their garage sale and made $46. Not too bad, for as little as I had over there.

Well, I still had a few things and lets just say Valerie had a lot of things...

(just kidding, fake photo) and so we tried to come up with a time/place to have a sale where she lives. So, we conned Molly (and Dan), my sister's sister-in-law, into having one at her house. Three families...so 6 kids, lots of "stuff" and 3 days of "bliss", right? No, really I had a lot of fun and hadn't spent time with Molly for a long time.

I only made $25 at this sale (it cost me more in gas to get there). But, the time spent and the fun we had is irreplacable. I love hanging out with my sister, of course, and really enjoyed spending time getting to re-know Molly. All of the kids together were a little crazy, but by the end of it I was Aunt Jocey to Molly's kids and she is still Aunt Molly to Trey.

I thought the kids might enjoy a Lemonade Stand so we got one going. (I think they sold 1 cup of lemonade, poor things.)

Emerson, Trey, Aubreigh, & Hayden

(Not pictured are AJ and Todd)

Anyway, my sister made a killing compared to Molly & I. I think she made well over $200. She stinks! Thanks again Molly & Dan for letting us hang out and use your garage!!

(Bump) ***God On The Mountain

2008-08-15T07:30:00.000-04:00

This blog was originally posted August 13th, but the jib jabs took over. I didn't want anyone to miss it, so I bumped it up to today!

I started this blog for a few reasons, but one of them is so that our families could catch up with us online. Well, my mother-in-law, Rosella, has read some of my posts and sent us a very encouraging letter.

She told us of a book she was reading about Bill Gaither. In the book the song "God On The Mountain" by Tracy Dartt brought me to her mind and she wanted to share it. So, I wanted to share it with you...

God On The Mountain

Tracy Dartt

Life is easy when you're on the mountain

And you've got peace of mind like you've never known

But things change when you're down in the valley

Don't lose faith for you're never alone

For the God on the mountain is still God in the valley

When things go wrong He'll make them right

And the God of the good times is still God in the bad times

The God of the day is still God in the night

You talk of faith way up on the mountain

Talk comes so easy when life's at it's best

Now it's down in the valley's of trials and temptation

That's when your faith is really put to the test

For the God on the mountain is still God in the valley

When things go wrong He'll make them right

And the God of the good times is still God in the bad times

The God of the day is still God in the night

Thanks Rosella for thinking of us and sharing this with us. Thanks for your prayers and we are thankful for you!

When things go wrong He'll make them right...

Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge, I will repay," say the Lord. ~Romans 12:19

PS. I'm learning about forgiveness. Great things! More on that soon...

Don't Laugh Too Hard!!

2008-08-13T19:21:00.002-04:00

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House For Sale!!

2008-08-12T10:40:00.000-04:00

Our house has been on the market since November 2007. We're renting an apartment in the town where Frank's new job is and so far, so good. But, what a TERRIBLE time to sell a home!

It's not like we've built a $500K new home down the street because we felt like it. We are moving out of town!! Ugh. Just a little frustration, I guess. I know there are a lot of people having trouble selling their home.

We've had a lot of showings, a few open houses, even one potential buyer came back a second time, AND we've dropped the price a total of $10K!!!

I just want all of my belongings in one place. I want to be able to invite people over to our house. I want the dog to not have to be tied out, but have a HUGE backyard to run around in. And I don't want to worry about Trey playing outside, while the inmates from the county jail mow the nearby grass!! (Seriously!)

Sorry for the selfish ramblings. I really am trusting God that in His perfect timing, this will all work out. I know He has the perfect place picked out for us. I'm just trying to wait patiently...not one of my strong suits. :)

Any real estate suggestions out there???

Waiting, waiting...

2008-08-06T08:16:00.007-04:00

Patience, not one of my strong suits. Although after 5 years of infertility you would think I would "get it". Well, I am sure my patience has improved since then. And now I've been given another opportunity to develop this virtue.

I've read the book by Stormie Omartian, Just Enough Light for the Step I'm On, probably 4 times in my life. And, just recently, I picked it up again.

Chapter 12 is titled, "Waiting in the Wings". It was so good I had to read it to my dear husband when we went to bed last night. (Which, by the way, he loves it when I do that.) Well, anyway, he felt that I should blog about it. It was THAT good. Hopefully you will get as much from this as we did.

A little back story... Trey was abused in December, and it is now August. Things initially went along quickly and then it seems we came to a stand still. The trial is now set for October! It seemed everything was working against us and we got soo frustrated. I have often called out to God asking not just "why" did this happen to Trey, but "why" is it taking so long to come to completion. It's like torture!! Well, last night we gained some perspective...

Excerpts from the book...

"I've found it's best to view these waiting times by thinking of them as times of waiting on the Lord. Try it. You'll see. It's much easier to think about waiting on God than it is to be patient with your circumstances. Waiting on the Lord gives you the sense that something is going on - only you just can't see it. You are waiting in eager anticipation of what God is going to do next."

WOW!! What perspective! It was like my eyes were opened - I'm waiting on God, nobody else.

Here's more:

"You are always going somewhere in God's plan. And His purpose for you is constantly being realized. But you have to be patient and wait for Him to accomplish it His way and in His time."

Praise God, He is in control! Why do I have to try to control everything? I am not just sitting here in neutral like I've felt I was.

And more:

"If you ever feel like you are just going through the motions in your own life, don't let yourself become frustrated over it. (Is she talking to me??) Know that God's mercies to you are new every morning and as a result, God freshly hears your words spoken to Him as well... Even though you may not see results as soon as you would like, much is happening in the spirit realm that you don't see. Each prayer sets something in motion."

"Patience is not resignation. It's joyful anticipation of the glory that is before you... As you wait for the next scene of your life to begin, center yourself in the Lord, tell Him you are content to wait for His perfect timing, and ask Him to keep you from stumbling into any bad lighting."

A few scripture references:
Isaiah 40:31
Psalm 130:5-6
James 1:2-4 (Struggle with that one)
Lamentations 3:25-26
Psalm 27:14.

Can anyone relate?

Tattoos

2008-08-05T09:45:00.000-04:00

I've never really been fond of tattoos. You know, the typical skull & crossbones or butterfly. No real meaning behind them. I've always felt like you stood out more if you DIDN'T have a tattoo. My husband wanted one early in our marriage and I was really against it. I don't know if it was just how I was raised, or just to go against him. :) Hey, I was 19 at the time!

Anyway, I recently had the urge to get a tattoo. I didn't know what I was going to get, but I knew it would have to do with Trey.

So I did a little research and came up with this...

I want to become a part of child abuse prevention...the blue ribbon.

I found a slogan that states Reach Out Against Child Abuse...the hand.

I know that my Trey was and is in God's hand...Trey's name and the hand.

Honestly, I love my tattoo. I got it for me, not anyone else. It's a little therapeutic. It's subtle, it doesn't require detailed explanation. If I want you to know what it means, I can tell you. If I don't, it just represents Trey & I.

Isaiah 49:15-16

Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.

Jesus loves me this I know. For the Bible tells me so. He will not forget me or you!

Friends Are Friends Forever??

2008-08-01T11:00:00.000-04:00

According to Michael W. Smith, this is true, "if the Lord's the Lord of them". I've always thought, "wow, forever??". You see, I am a PK. Yep, the dreaded preacher's kid. (Love ya Dad!) No, really. It's something that I have always loved. However, being as such, we were never in one place for a long time for me to establish long-term friendships.

You hear people say, "oh Suzie and I have been friends since kindergarten". Not me... My sister and I are best friends because whenever we moved, we both moved. A built-in best friend! I love her for it and believe that's why we are as close as we are today. I wouldn't change it for the world!

Frank & I have been married for 11 years now and within the first year or so of our marriage we met a newly married couple at church. We've had great times together. Hanging out late at night, going to each other with the normal "newlywed" stuff, having children, being there for each other during hard times, etc. I saw us going to their kids graduations, weddings, being empty nesters together, etc. Did we have our disagreements?...oh yea, but seriously saw ourselves in the "forever friends" category. This was my longest lasting friend - EVER, with the exception of my hubby, and sister, of course.

Well, due to certain circumstances, this friendship has all but disintegrated. The circumstances are UGLY, let me tell you. It has to do with the abuse my son suffered. Terrible, terrible circumstances. No, they had nothing to do with it.

But, due to differing opinions/beliefs, this friendship is probably over. I can't believe I just typed those words. We have gone through so much with the abuse, that in itself is horrible. But, then to lose someone so close to you, someone you would normally depend on during this time, is another loss I am mourning. I have prayed and prayed, asking my God why this is happening. I have always held out hope that somewhere, sometime, that the truth would be revealed and that Michael W. Smith was RIGHT!!

However, it's been seven months and here I sit. Believing that I have to...let go. Ugh.

People have said to me, "why would you want to be friends with her now?" and "why are you still worrying about that?". A ten year friendship, gone in a flash.

But, I guess although friends are friends forever, it's not JUST because the Lord's the Lord of them. There is also free-will. Free will to choose to believe one thing or another. Free will. Free will to make a decision without knowing all of the facts. Free will. It hurts, man, does it hurt. But it's out of my hands. I put it in His hands, praying that He will reign in this situation. After all, HE is the Lord.

Working With His Daddy

2008-07-31T08:00:00.002-04:00

Trey LOVES working on cars with his Dad. In fact, my 3 year-old son would rather work on a truck in 90 degree weather than go swimming with his Mom & friends. He is crazy!!

I love the fact that there is something that they both love to do and get to do it together. I love my husband for allowing our 3 year-old to "help" him change the oil or rotate the tires when surely he could do it faster without the "help". What a great Daddy!

Yes, he's sitting in the engine compartment!

Working on the 79 Chevy

He has his own work clothes, or as he says, "oberalls and work shoes" and gets so excited to fix anything. When people ask him if he's going to be a doctor like Daddy, he says, "Nope, I'm going to fix cars". I love that little guy so much!!

We want Trey to grow up to be whatever he wants to be!! I'm excited to see what God has in store for our little man!

New Trial Date

2008-07-24T23:31:00.003-04:00

First of all, I just want to say that the prosecutor on our case ROCKS!! I truly believe that the case has been postponed until this time because HE is who God wanted to prosecute the case.

It appears that the trial will take place October 2nd & 3rd. I say appears because, well, we've been told dates before and things change. I am okay with this new date. It took a little while and some chatting with the prosecutor before I came to be okay, but we are definitely trusting God. I wish it was sooner, but believe that God has a plan.

Keep on praying! God wants to hear from us and we covet your prayers during this time.

My Blessings

2008-07-23T22:43:00.005-04:00

Sweetness and orneriness personified!

Best friends and cousins.

These are my sister's babies and Trey.

Emerson, Aubreigh and AJ!

My sister Valerie and her kids came out last week for a visit. They live about 4 hours away. We miss them like crazy! Trey talks about Eme, Aubreigh & AJ almost daily. They really are his best friends. When they get together it's like they haven't missed a beat. You would think they live next door. Emerson & Aubreigh have taught him everything they know...which is scary. And if Trey & Aubreigh are missing at the same time, watch out, they are surely up to no good. AJ is Trey's only boy cousin, so he is definitely looking forward to teaching him all about cars, trucks & tractors!

I love these kids like they are my own. I was there when Em was born, on my way when Aubreigh was born, and just finished painting Valerie's toenails when she went into labor with AJ. I would do anything for them as if they were my own. Aunt Jocey loves you all!

So, this is a shout out to all the cousins out there!

Uncle Frankie, Aunt Jocey & Trey miss
everyone and hope to see you soon!

(And I'm sure you'll be hearing more about
my awesome sister later!)

The Trial

2008-07-19T08:01:00.003-04:00

Ugh. Our pre-trial was scheduled for July 23rd (this coming Wednesday). We believe it is being rescheduled once again. (This would be our 4th pre-trial.) I can't believe it. The trial was scheduled for July 31st and it's been scheduled since April. It has to be moved as well.

I feel like I've tried to rise above all of the politics of the justice process. You always hear how bad our court system is, and so I tried to keep a level head. I knew our time would come and was beginning to feel confident that this was it.

On July 18th, it has been exactly 7 months since the abuse of my son occurred. The two bones in his right forearm both fractured and surgery to set one of them, bruising around his neck and other places, terrible marks on his buttocks. Doesn't he deserve justice for what happened to him? In a timely manner? Why does it feel like he is the one who receives the littlest consideration?

I am angry! I haven't felt this way about this situation before now. Was I upset initially? You bet! But I was confident that the system would provide justice. Now, my family continues to be abused over and over again. All while "he" sits on his butt a free man, paying no consequence.

Hotel rooms booked, family requesting time off work, childcare set up for the children, physician's schedules cleared for that day and now must be booked back up. Those things seem menial, but it's our life everyday. Waiting for our time to come.

Will it ever end? We need closure.

Please pray for my family. God sees the big picture and we get only but a glimpse. We are trying to trust Him, knowing that we are in his hands.

Meet Melissa...

2008-07-15T10:39:00.011-04:00

Honestly, the sweetest person I have ever met.

Selfless wife, awesome mom, great friend. And she knows that God is in control.

Frank & I met Doug & Melissa their first Sunday at church when they moved to Dayton. We have shared a lot of experiences together, mostly the birth of their three children and our Trey.

Trey, Lauren & Caleb

Audrey

And we share the bond of being doctor's wives.
(Which contrary to popular belief, is no easy task.)

When you live far away from family, friends tend to fill that gap and that's exactly how I'd describe our relationship with the Rexs. We love their kids like neices & nephew and know that they feel the same about Trey. That's a great part of being a part of God's family.

In March of this year, Melissa was diagnosed with non-hodgkins lymphoma. She is 31 years-old. She is undergoing chemotherapy every three weeks. Four treatments down, two more to go. All tests thus far show that the lymphoma is responding to treatment. Now I can add to the list of her attributes, strongest woman I know.

I just wanted to introduce you to one of the most special people in my life. Please pray for Melissa & her family. Pray that her chemo continues to be effective. Pray that their move out of state would go smoothly as possible. Pray for their little ones, who will grow to be great people because of the parents who raised them.

Check out her blog, authored by her sister, Jenn:

http://www.danceintherainmelissa.blogspot.com/

Why "Our Hope Endures"

2008-07-13T10:18:00.012-04:00

**This is a blog from my myspace page that I bumped over here for your reading pleasure.**
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Okay, so the last 4 months of my life have been nearly more than I can bear...seriously, things that you cannot imagine, 4 very significant events in 4 months and then some...

Through trials you learn a lot of things: about yourself and about others. I've learned that we can NEVER know what others are going through unless we ourselves have gone through it. And even then every situation is different.

You find out what your friend's are made of. You find out if they're willing to stand up for what is right no matter the consequences...no matter. You find out who is really there for you, no matter how far away.

I'm finding out what I'm made of. I'm not as tough as I thought I was. I'm finding out that I depend too much on myself and not enough on God.

Abuse of a child & a friend who doesn't believe it, a best friend with 3 little ones who has cancer at 31, loss of a child, loss of an important friendship, loss of innocense, loss of everything you believed to be your future.

I just heard this song this past weekend (at Women of Faith in April).
It seems as though it was written just for me.

Our Hope Endures ~Natalie Grant

You would think only so much can go wrong
Calamity only strikes once
And you assume this one has suffered her share
Life will be kinder from here

Oh, but sometimes the sun stays hidden for years
Sometimes the sky rains night after night
When will it clear?

But our Hope endures the worst of conditions
It's more than our optimism
Let the earth quake
Our Hope is unchanged

How do we comprehend peace within pain?
Or joy at a good man's wake?
Walk a mile with the woman whose body is torn
With illness, but she marches on.

Oh, 'cause sometimes the sun stays hidden for years
Sometimes the sky rains night after night
When will it clear?
But our Hope endures the worst of conditions
It's more than our optimism

Let the earth quake
Our Hope is unchanged

Emmanuel, God is with us
El Shaddai, all sufficient

We never walk alone
And this is our hope

Overcomer!

2008-07-11T09:47:00.020-04:00

Yesterday Trey & I went to a playground. We've been hiding out in the house for a while, so it was definitely time to get out and play. He had such a good time, running around, going down the slides and swinging, and saying hello to the kids he would run past.

Watching him over these past few months, seeing him grow, watching him come out of his shell, has been bitter sweet. He has been through so much since the abuse in December and when I see how much he's overcome, I just thank God for putting his hand on Trey during this time.

People always say, "kids are resilient". I admit it, I've said it too. But NO child should have to overcome abuse. They should not HAVE to be resilient. If you would, say a prayer for Trey today, he is definitely our miracle from God.

Here we go!

2008-07-10T10:48:00.014-04:00

I guess everyone has to have a "first" post...so here it is. I'm starting this blog for therapy and believe me, I need it. :)

A lot of things have happened in our life in the last year and this is where you will probably hear all about it: the good, the bad and the ugly. But, oh the blessings that we have as well! And you'll be sure to hear all about them too! So welcome, and here we go!